Mindset Matters

I was just contacted by one of my very first clients, a wonderful family who had originally invested with me during the throes of the Great Recession. We have certainly faced difficult times together before, but today is different. The wife has been battling cancer, had it beaten into remission, but then it came back. The husband reached out to me today, letting me know he needs help getting his wife’s affairs in order. I knew things had not been going well but I was not ready to hear that today. His wife has been a fighter through this whole process. She beat it once, and I know they haven’t given up yet, but it’s looking very bleak. Absolutely devastating. I am soberly reminded how precious and fragile life is. This woman is fighting so hard for each and every moment, facing incredible emotional and physical pain. Every day is a battle, sometimes every breath. And she is not alone. There are millions of people out there literally fighting for their lives and would be wi...

In my world, “returns” are a big deal. The financial media is always touting the short term returns of some index or stock or commodity. No doubt, they are also sensationalizing it and making a big story out of a meaningless event. People are so focused on the short-term returns of their investments, they often lose sight of long-term goals. While we are so caught up with investment returns, we don’t analyze ourselves with the same vigor. So, here is a question for you: what type of returns are you giving those who have invested in you? Are those who are depending on you seeing any profit for that confidence and trust? You want the best returns out of your 401k, but are you seeking maximum gains from yourself as well? I have two parents who each sacrificed a great deal for me to have the education and upbringing I did. My siblings have both supported me and looked up to me. I had some phenomenal professors in college who went far above and beyond their job description to ...

Failure hurts. A lot. It can push you down, beat you up and make you want to quit. It can be confusing and embarrassing. Failure is never fun. But failure can also strengthen you. It can force you to come back with something better than you originally produced. It can create perseverance and tenacity. Failure is rarely a welcome guest but sometimes a necessary visitor. You will rarely advance in anything without first dancing with failure. We are taught at an early age to believe failure is bad. We live in a society of eighth place trophies and participation metals. Grade school sports have removed scoreboards. We’ve accepted the elimination of a win as long as we can avoid the loss. How tragic this is. Have we forgotten there is no true victory where a loss is not possible? We have worked so hard to eliminate the sting of defeat, but in doing so we have also blocked the path of progress.   A life of significance requires the grit and determination only the venom ...

There’s an old Spartan proverb that says, “Sweat more in training, bleed less in battle.” The message, of course, is to take the risks and feel the pain when the level of danger is relatively low and controlled, thus increasing your chances of safety when the excrements hit the oscillator. Another way to think of this is pushing the envelope and taking your bumps and bruises when the stakes are relatively low, then you will be better prepared when the stakes are high. Don’t hope you will rise to the occasion when the conflict comes; assume you will fall back to your level of preparation. In Sun Tzu’s Art of War, he writes “most battles are won or lost before they are ever fought.” It’s the skills and mindset we develop during the times of peace and comfort that determine how we will respond during conflict and hardship. In business and in life, we never know when the battles will come. For a business, it can be the loss of a key partner, a downturn in the economy, a shif...

In February of 2017, the Atlanta Falcons battled the team who shall remain nameless for the NFL Championship in Super Bowl LI. The Falcons were nearly unstoppable in the first half, rattling off 21 un-answered points before the other team, whose name escapes me at the moment, finally scored with a field goal in the closing seconds of the half. The second half started much like the first, with Atlanta quickly adding to their lead by capping off their first drive of the third quarter with another touchdown. The score was now 28-3 Atlanta and they looked to be in complete control. They were totally dominating their opponents and were no doubt aware of the fact no team in Super Bowl history had ever come back from more than a ten point deficit. At a twenty-five point lead, the Falcons were comfortable. And that was the problem: they were comfortable and got complacent. Instead of trying to win, it seemed they were more focused on not losing. “Winning” and “not losing” may seem th...

Life is sometimes referred to as a “rat race” and for good reason. For many upstanding Americans, the description fits all too well. You are encouraged as a child to work hard, turn off the TV and video games, and to do well in school. Why? Because if you do well in school you can go to a good college. If you do well in college you’ll get a valuable degree and with a valuable degree you’ll land a good job. If you have a good job then you can earn more money. If you earn more money you might be able to save enough of it to quit that job to retire … and sit around watching TV. Yes, the goal is to quit the same job you got with the good degree, from the good college from doing well in school as a kid. Does that cycle seem a little meaningless and empty to you? It’s a slog each week, Monday through Friday, just to make it to the weekend where you get a short reprieve and do it all over again. That’s exhausting! It’s no wonder people are depressed and angry. If the prize at the end...

We’ve all heard the phrase “chasing a dream,” but I’m not sure that’s really enough. To chase something, we are in a reactive state of mind and responding in the moment. No, when it comes to pursuing our goals, passions and God-given talents, we need to plan and prepare. We must learn to both anticipate and adapt. We must not just chase, but hunt. Hunting implies the strategic and intentional pursuit of a target; but when it comes to our ambitions, people often employ a different strategy. Tree stands allow a hunter to sit up off the ground, in relative safety and comfort, and wait for an unsuspecting animal to wander within range. It’s a very passive way of hunting. Rather than tactically planning out a quest in search of the desired trophy, the hunter sits on his can and waits for his prey to come to him. Now, while this may or may not be an effective or accepted strategy for filling the freezer, it’s not the argument I am trying to make. Chasing animals in the woods ...

A few months after losing a heartbreaking game to the Eagles in the NFL Championship Game (pre-Super Bowl days) to end their 1960 season, the Green Bay Packers convened for their 1961 training camp with a group of hungry veterans. They were out for redemption and eager to get a fresh start on a new season. Their legendary coach, Vince Lombardi, greeted his team by holding up a pigskin and declaring, “Gentlemen, this is a football.” With that, he set the precedent for the rest of training camp: they would be going back to refine and perfect the basics. No new fancy plays; they would review blocking and tackling and start on page one of the playbook. Six months later the Packers won the NFL Championship with a 37-0 blowout of the Giants. The Lombardi Era had begun. John Wooden’s reputation as a basketball coach was mythical. They called him “The Wizard of Westwood.” He won ten NCAA championships in twelve years, including seven consecutive titles. His team once won 88 straight ...

I grew up being homeschooled. This was homeschooled back in the 80’s, long before it was cool and popular (if it even is now). This was when only weirdos and social misfits did it. I won’t pretend for a minute my family was the rare exception and that I was super cool and popular. I was a complete dork like the rest of them. Even my imaginary friends ignored me. However, I wouldn’t trade that experience for anything. Although the education I received, the self-reliance I learned, the work ethic I developed, and the discipline I discovered were all invaluable, I’ve been learning to appreciate one of the side effects of my homeschool experience I didn’t used to value: I learned to be okay with being different. It was certainly not a widely acceptable “different” either, and I was very aware of that. We were a weird kind of different. Being an outsider as a child was extremely uncomfortable. I wanted to fit in and be like everyone else but I wasn’t given that choice. Some da...

People in this country complain a lot. When the economy is down we complain about jobs, unemployment and the stock market crashing. When the economy is up we complain about inflation, minimum wage and the stock market being too high. We fuss about the mud when it rains and the heat when it’s sunny. As a society, we have also learned to blame anyone and everyone when things haven’t worked out for us. We’ve become very adept at playing the victim. That’s sad and tragic because we whine about problems that people from many other nations would give anything to have. It’s been said a fish is the last one to discover water. Why? Even though water is all around him and that’s all he knows, he doesn’t notice it because of that very circumstance: water is all around him. He takes it for granted and neither notices or appreciates it. That’s what’s wrong with a lot of us, we are surrounded by so much blessing and opportunity that we don’t even realize it’s there. When I was going ...

The famous speaker, Les Brown, used to talk about facing ghosts on your deathbed. He would ask his audience to imagine the ghosts “of the ideas, the dreams, the abilities, the talents given to you by life” – potential that was never acted on – coming to them as they prepared to exit this life, demanding an explanation as to why they (the ghosts) were never allowed into existence. Describing the ghosts he says, “And there they are standing around your bed looking at you with large angry eyes, saying, 'we came to you, and only you could have given us life! Now we must die with you forever.'” Les goes on to detail the scene a bit more and it culminates with a question, “If you die today, what ideas, what dreams, what abilities, what talents, what gifts, would die with you?” An amazing question to ponder! Introspectively consider that question but then imagine another scene. Instead of the “ghosts” of forgone possibilities, what if it was loved ones you had to answer ...

When a young elephant is originally placed in captivity, it is trained to comply by tethering its leg to a post. When this first takes place, the small elephant will pull and yank at the rope or chain holding it in place. The cord will rub the flesh raw and even tear open the leg of the poor creature. It’s a sad scene indeed. Over time, the elephant gradually succumbs to the power of whatever has bound him and he fights it less and less. Eventually he will place almost no tension at all on his bindings, reversing movement as soon as the slightest resistance is experienced. As the creature grows in stature and strength, the strength of the rope or chain do not. He has learned a certain level of helplessness and no longer tests the power of his confinements. The small chain that once bloodied his young leg couldn’t possibly hold back the five tons he now carries. Even if the chain would hold, the mature elephant would easily pull the stake out of the ground just like you wo...

When climbers are ascending mountains at significant altitude, they must repeatedly go through a series of acclimatization periods along the way. This often requires climbing up to specific elevation but then coming back down at the end of the day to camp at a much lower altitude. This allows the body to slowly adapt to the decreasing partial pressure of oxygen, or “thinner air,” experienced as the climber ascends. By spending the night at a lower camp, the body is given time to make the necessary adjustments, such as increasing red blood cell concentration in the bloodstream, required to deal with the stress of activity with less available oxygen. Although the process of ascending and descending the same slopes can be frustrating and sometimes demoralizing, it is essential to the success of the mission. Without the time to acclimate, and actually come down from higher altitudes, the body is not yet prepared to deal with the challenges it will face as elevation increases. The...

Sometimes God sends me little reminders to adjust my perspective and this morning I got exactly that. I saw a middle aged man preparing to exit his vehicle in the parking lot in front of me. He was struggling greatly and needed assistance from his friend to simply get out of his seat. He was probably over six feet tall but it was hard to tell because his posture was incredibly weakened and he was terribly hunched over. Despite his height, he probably weighed less than 120lbs, his muscles severely atrophied and his limbs contorted at odd angles. He could barely walk and every step through the parking lot was greatly labored. My mind was flooded with a strange mix of emotions: thankfulness for the many blessings in my life, as well as guilt for the whining I sometimes engage in despite everything I have. Here was the real kicker though, where do you think I saw this man? He was at the GYM! This guy clearly had been knocked down by life and no one would have judged him for givin...

I am a tad bit competitive and have been that way since I can remember. I still recall basketball, baseball and football games from my youth in which we narrowly lost, leaving me with a tremendous feeling of both guilt and frustration. Haunted by the thoughts of “what if I had just pushed a little harder,” the what-could-have-beens bothered me to no end. At a commencement speech for a class of graduating college students, Denzel Washington reminded the graduates, “You will never see a U-Haul behind a hearse,” painting an impactful illustration of the “you can’t take it with you” concept. He encouraged those young men and women to strive, above all else, to make a difference in the lives of those around them because that is a legacy that remains. As I listened to his marvelous speech, I was reminded of those heart-breaking losses as a young athlete, and I think what he was saying is connected to what I felt after those games. The phrase we often hear regarding a big contes...

I’ve never been a particularly quiet person but I remember being very fearful to share my opinion or an idea within a group of people. I recall scenarios in classes where everyone would be required to give an answer or share an observation regarding a particular subject or recent event. I can still feel the pressure mounting as I awaited my turn, sitting there in terror, wishing I could turn myself invisible or avoid the moment altogether with an aptly timed building fire or maybe a seizure. And yes, my hopeful escapes were that extreme. I don’t think it was really the speaking in front of a group that bothered me so much. I know part of the issue was being afraid of the opinions of others, especially my peers. But I think the biggest obstacle was the potential to be WRONG in front of everyone, with my error in full view of my classmates and no ability to take it back. That’s what terrified me. I know there are many times in life where I could have helped someone discover...

Years ago, treasury agents tasked with identifying counterfeit currency didn’t have the technology available today and thus relied heavily on the look and feel of the bills to determine legitimacy. They had to undergo extensive training, exhaustively studying cold hard cash. However, they rarely studied counterfeit notes. There were many ways to create fake currency and endless variations on what the final product might look like with just slight derivations from the real thing. It was impossible to effectively explore all the ways a bill could be imitated. Instead, they analyzed relentlessly only the Real McCoy. By intimately knowing what a real bill should look like, and recognizing every small detail and nearly imperceptible mark, anything but legal tender would be quickly spotted. I think we can all take a lesson from these agents. Before embarking on a task or developing something new, its human nature to focus on everything that might go wrong, all the ways the id...

Most people won’t seek transformation until the pain of their current circumstances is greater than the discomfort of making the change:  - It’s a couple who waits until their marriage is almost unbearable before actively working on the relationship or seeking counseling.  - It’s the 9-5 corporate employee who hates his job and dreads going to work but doesn’t leave until he’s finally fired (years too late) and is forced to find something different.  - It’s the grandmother who sacrificed years of her life to obesity before finally deciding to commit to diet and exercise when she is faced with the harsh reality that she can’t play with her grandkids without getting out of breath.  - It’s all of us when we complain about the situation around us and the shortcomings of others without making the necessary adjustments in ourselves. Please don’t put off the progress you must make. It’s hard to pay the piper while you are comfortable, or at least not miser...

I do hope to encourage anyone who reads these posts. I hope I could even inspire others to be better versions of themselves and to make a greater impact on the world around them. But part of why I do this is for me. I do not like to write and this is uncomfortable for me. Yet, I am forcing myself to create something every day. By giving myself a daily deadline, I seek to inoculate myself against procrastination. I must deliver something, finished or not, by the end of the day for anyone to see. And maybe even more importantly, for anyone to judge. I like black and white, right or wrong. I like to know that I can follow the necessary steps, the right formula, and eventually get myself to the correct solution. In college I became very fond of mathematics, partly because there was a definite solution to every problem, a starting point and an end. There was certainty, there was comfort. There are no right answers in writing but yet I can still be “wrong” or at least critic...

15 years ago this summer, I was sitting in a dreaded Organic Chemistry class – a class where good GPAs went to die. Not only is O-Chem a tough class anyway, but I was taking it over the summer, which meant a full year of information would be crammed into ten weeks. We had two hours of lecture every day and five hour labs every other day. Then there was the icing on the cake, that summer the course was being taught by one of the WWAMI (University of Washington Medical School cooperative with University of Alaska) Professors. We were going to have a year-long Med School Chemistry course machine gunned at us in two months. I wasn’t too worried because all forty of us in the class would be in the same boat. We all had the same steep hill to ascend and I knew if I could out-climb all of them, my perfect GPA would survive. Also, the professor didn’t adhere to posted office hours and rarely answered questions in class. He would give you the information once and then you were on you...

As Lewis and Clark worked their way through the Dakotas in 1804, during the Fall of the expedition’s first year, they began finding themselves at the center of conflicts between various Native American tribes. Carrying weapons, medicine, tobacco and whiskey, the men of the expedition controlled valuable but very limited commodities. Goods acquired from these explorers gave the fortunate recipients a significant advantage over their opponents, leading to jealousy and indignation when there wasn’t enough to go around to neighboring tribes. The expedition’s trade with various groups, along with the political nature of some of the interactions, seemed to add fuel to the already smoldering discord existing between several of these tribes. At times, the expedition was literally caught in the crossfire as warring factions exchanged blows.   Fearing for the safety of his men and the success of their mission, Captain Lewis began to lobby for peace between adversarial tribes. Peace...

We talk a lot about change, “Change is good” and “I need a change” or maybe “I just wish he would change.” I even heard a prominent political figure talk about “hope and change.” But is “change” really the answer? Change is a natural process requiring no direction or intention. Change happens whether we like it or not, it’s inevitable. Our world and lives are in a constant state of flux, we don’t need to seek out change, it finds us. If I ignore my wife and neglect to make time for her, our relationship will change. We will grow apart and become more distant. Intimacy will suffer. If I don’t pay attention to what I eat, I will change. I will get fatter and feel sluggish, but hey, at least it’s change! What we must seek is progress. Progress is directed change. It requires sacrifice, intentionality and commitment. It demands you have a plan of action and execute deliberately. Most importantly, it doesn’t happen by accident. Too many are hoping to advance in life, but ...

I think our talents and potential are a lot like parachutes. They don’t work until we jump. The resistance in the free fall itself is what makes the parachute function. Without it, the chute won’t open up or deploy. Too often, we sit in the inside the fuselage of our comfort zone and look out at the world below, waiting for that elusive, “right moment,” that will probably never come. We want the parachute to open immediately so we don’t have to endure the disruption of the initial plunge into the unknown. It simply doesn’t work that way. If the chute opens within the plane, it becomes a tangled mess, tethering the jumper all the more to the aircraft. If your talents and potential blossomed inside your comfort zone, you would never fully realize what they are capable of and find yourself restrained from jumping even more. Just as the resistance of the air forces the chute to fully expand, allowing it to perform, so the resistance we experience after the leap develops and e...

I recently attended a business coaching conference featuring Dave Ramsey. He’s a great presenter with many impressive insights, but one in particular really stuck out to me:   “Success is standing on a pile of failures, not lying underneath them.” Simple quote but the message is profound. Failure is inevitable in this life. There is no getting around it. We can try to avoid it, shirk away in fear, quit and lie down when we face it. That is when it ends up on top of us. Or we can accept and even seek failure. Not that we fail purposely, but we must push our own limits until we fail. Then we can adjust and adapt to push again, a little harder and a little smarter than before, climbing on top of the failure instead of being crushed by it. Failure helps us hone our skills, to stretch and grow. The losses give us greater appreciation for the wins. Failure creates perspective. Great accomplishments happen because of failures, not in spite of them.

Two and a half decades ago I was hunting on Kodiak Island with my dad and some friends from church. It was a cold, windy November day and, like it often does on Kodiak, the rain was coming down hard. Thankfully, our friends had a wonderful cabin just off the beach. After a long day of unsuccessful hunting, we walked into that cabin, cold and wet and ready to be out of the elements. Someone got a fire started in the stove immediately and we began shedding our soaked clothes and basking in the warmth of that little stove. I don’t remember exactly how it happened but someone must have gone outside and didn’t quite latch the door. Even though the cabin had an enclosed mudroom going out from the door, there was soon a noticeable draft in that small room and then a gust of wind pushed the door open even more just as I was walking by. My dad casually asked me to shut the door and then the five words which would become infamous fell out of my mouth, “I didn’t leave it open.” ...

I used to have an image in my head of what an artist looked like and it was less than complimentary. I envisioned someone in strange clothes with provocative hair, teetering on the edge of poverty, whilst twisting metal together or flinging paint at a wall, and probably living in a friend’s basement. And I certainly never saw myself as an artist. I would remind myself I am not creative enough to ever produce “art”. I am sorry I ever told myself these lies. So what is art? Over the last several years I have learned to expand my definition of art. I believe art is creating and bringing something into existence – an idea, a concept, a product or even a process. It involves more than just refining and shaping what is there, it is imagining what isn’t tangible or perceptible and bringing it to life. Art is seeing something on a blank canvas that no one else sees and continuing to create until you can show others what you’ve envisioned all along. And it is most certainly coloring...

Today we celebrate our Great Nation’s independence and freedom. As we’ve often been reminded, freedom isn’t free.   While I passionately agree and feel the cost of our freedom is too often trivialized and ignored, I think there’s another conversation that needs to be discussed. Freedom is a gift and we are immensely blessed to be born in this country and during this time. However, like any gift, that freedom must be both accepted and utilized to be fully appreciated. In this country, freedom is a choice we must make. Although our nation affords us great freedoms, we too often reject those freedoms and choose to live in bondage of one form or another. As of the end of 2017, the average credit card balance was nearly $16k, the average mortgage was just under $180k, the average auto loan was approaching $28k and the average student loan was over $47K. How much of your budget goes to paying creditors including mortgages, 20%? 30%? More? If 30% of your budget goes to payme...

One of my favorite movies of all time, “Braveheart”, is full of great quotes and inspiring messages. It’s hard to pick out the “best” one but this would be at the top of the list: “Every man dies, but not every man really lives.” Although that message was directed at men who would have to risk their very necks to do what they knew to be right – men who would likely not live to see the outcome of their efforts – I think we all can take a lot away from those eight words.   A life without significance is hardly a life at all, and very few have ever created anything of significance without much risk and difficulty. Is that situation too extreme? Those Scottish rebels faced a degree of peril many of us can’t relate to and it may be unlikely you will ever be faced with a similar scenario. However, Oscar Wilde had a very similar thought when he wrote, “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” He penned that in the 1800’s but I think it’s eve...

As I was outside watering and fertilizing my lawn, which I absolutely hate doing, I was listening to some speeches on my iPhone and heard the following quote: “The most important variable in behavior change is being able to force yourself to behave differently than how you feel.” Not only did I love the quote, I also was able to kill off some feelings of self-pity for my current circumstances. If people worried less about their feelings and more about what needs to be done, this world would be a far better place. Even in my own life, I often don’t “feel” like doing what I need to do. I don’t like waking up early; I really like my bed. I never look forward to vegetables. I rarely look forward to going to the gym. I’d rather watch TV at night than read books. Just like the Sirens from Greek mythology, feelings call out with dangerous and deceptive songs. I’ve learned I must control my feelings or they will control me. Human beings are hard wired to want what brings comfort so...