Lies of Perfectionism

A couple days ago I was talking with a man who was telling me about some of the financial struggles his mother-in-law is facing. He has witnessed a pattern of bad financial decisions and irresponsible management that has plagued her for years. Wanting to help her reverse this downward spiral, he offered to help her with a budget and come up with a game plan for the future. Appreciative, she thanked him for his willingness to help, but suggested that maybe he could take a look at her finances once she got everything in order and got her money problems cleaned up.

Does that make any sense? Why would she even need his help at that point? It’s like saying that you will wait to go to the doctor until you are healthy again! “Yeah, I know I have an oozing abscess in my throat, but I think I’ll wait to for that to heal up and then go see a doctor …” Crazy, right? But is it any different than someone wanting to get in better shape before joining a gym? Or losing weight before hiring a trainer? Or watching Youtube videos to practice your two-step before taking a dance class?

It’s the lie your ego tells you, the one that says you must get all your ducks in a row before you start something new or go after a goal. That you must get everything figured out ahead of time. Your pride tells you that you are unprepared and if you start now, you’ll look stupid, people will laugh, and you will fail in front of the whole world. It reminds you that the circumstances aren’t perfect and if you wait until you are “ready,” things will go smoother. These are some of the lies of perfectionism.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but perfect never shows up. If your diet was perfect, you wouldn’t need to lose weight. If your budget was flawless, you wouldn’t be running out of money every month and wondering where your paycheck went to hide. And if your ballroom dance steps would make Fred Astaire jealous, you wouldn’t need the classes. But the good news is that gyms are full of people who are out of shape, financial classes have plenty of broke members, and dance classes enroll lots of folks with two left feet (I know this because I’ve been one of them). Don’t listen to the lies of pride and perfectionism. Begin where you are at; just make a plan so you won’t stay there.

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