Skip to main content

Ambiguity



This past weekend my family started decorating the house for Christmas. The kids brought all the boxes and totes out of storage and my wife started planning out how to set up the room. As the work continued, I realized I was becoming uncomfortable with all the limitless possibilities in the decorating process. The placement of the tree, the locations for garland and lights, even where the ornaments would be placed on tree; there is no definitive “right” answer for any of those decisions. Feeling somewhat aimless, I opted to finish the dishes and do the laundry, tasks that were more defined with specific, measurable progress and end points. I later realized I was fleeing ambiguity.

Isn’t this the fear from which so many run? It’s not really the fear of failure or even uncertainty – although I’m certain these sources of fear are all connected – rather, it is the fear of ambiguity. It’s not that we are afraid of the path ahead or unsure of where the path might lead, the fear comes from the fact that there is no path and we must create one. Perhaps this is why it’s so difficult to start a business, write a book, paint a picture or compose a song. When there is no “right” answer and the problem isn’t clearly defined, the blank page, the empty canvas and uncharted trail can be terrifying. The “white space” can be overwhelming.

Failure is painful. Uncertainty is intimidating. But neither of these really scare me like they used to. However, I realized something about myself this weekend: it’s the ambiguity of limitless possibilities with no “correct” solution that truly frightens me. While I certainly have not discovered the solution, at least I have begun to define the problem.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Toxic Humility

We have all seen false humility: the guy who tries to hide his arrogance with feigned modesty. It’s usually pretty obvious and always obnoxious. But there is also another variation of false humility out there: toxic humility. This is often displayed in self-deprecating talk and a lack of self-confidence, belittling or undermining one’s own talents and abilities. The danger in this kind of behavior is twofold: it is too often accepted as true humility and like a virus, it spreads doubt and disbelief. To clarify, it is not that the bearer of this toxic humility isn’t honest about his view of himself. That is the very issue: he absolutely believes he has little value or utility. He thinks downplaying his own worth is humility but I disagree. CS Lewis said it best when he wrote, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking about yourself less.” His point being, true humility is not an ever-present raincloud of self-doubt that follows you around. It’s a focus on...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Art of Intentionality

  “Intentional living is the art of making our own choices before others’ choices make you.” – Richie Norton   I am not even sure who Richie Norton is, but I love that quote! I imagine a ship drifting out to sea, pushed around by the wind and the waves. No course of direction, yet the captain is frustrated when the ship ends up dashed against the rocks, trapped on a sandbar or marooned on an inhospitable island. It is easy to complain when life takes us where we do not want to go. But who is really to blame if we have never set our sails to align us along an appropriate course? Do we blame the waves, wind and the weather? Or should we blame the captain of the ship? It is our life and our ship. We must set our sails with intentionality and determined choices. Otherwise, we are doomed to aimlessly drift along according to the choices and decisions of others. 
Post a Comment
Read more

The Hungry Lion

  Early in my career, as I was struggling to both build up my clientele and provide food for my family, someone tried to encourage me by saying, “remember, the hungry lion hunts best.” At the time, that made sense to me. And it probably even provided some much-needed reassurance. But I have since come to think differently. I was a starving lion, and I learned a few things from the experience. Hungry lions get fatigued. They become desperate. They cut corners. They make unforced errors. But fed lions have their own issues. Their satiety can turn into selfishness. They get comfortable and then complacent. These lions do not hunt well either. I believe the lion who hunts best is not the hungry lion nor the satisfied lion, but rather the lion who hunts not for himself and his own hunger, but for the pride of lions around him. His drive is not his own need for nourishment; it is the hunger of those around him that motivates him. Our world is a hurting and hungry place. Not just ...
Post a Comment
Read more