Your Biggest Obstacle

When I sit down with a new client and look at long term goals and needs to begin charting their financial course, one of the things we consider are potential obstacles. We spend time discussing and identifying possible road blocks so we can then create solutions around or through that barrier. Isolating and identifying likely hurdles and obstructions along a path to any goal is an important step to overcoming those hurdles.

Along the path of life, you are likely your own biggest obstacle. And I am not just picking on you; I realize I am my own biggest obstacle as well. A lot of the excuses people make regarding their station in life and their circumstances are really just blame being deflected and placed where it doesn’t belong. For example, “I don’t have enough time” is often code for, “I don’t get up early enough” or “I waste too much time” or “I don’t prioritize my day.” Complaints about lacking opportunity commonly arise from someone not being prepared for the opportunity that does exist and/or not having the courage to pursue those opportunities. If you are always in and out of bad relationships, what is the common denominator in all those relationships? YOU! Listen to the people who whine about never having enough money at the end of the month, and then watch as they throw money they don’t have at stupid things they don’t need to impress people they don’t even like.

Please understand, this is not to beat you up, it is to empower you. If the bad news is that you are your own biggest problem, the great news is that fixing the problem is 100% something you can accomplish. You hold the keys and need not wait on someone else removing the barriers in your life. Now that you’ve identified your biggest challenge, you must seek to overcome your own weaknesses and destructive tendencies to get out of your own way. Start working on a plan to work through those and seek solutions to be an asset to yourself and not a liability.

Comments

Toxic Humility

We have all seen false humility: the guy who tries to hide his arrogance with feigned modesty. It’s usually pretty obvious and always obnoxious. But there is also another variation of false humility out there: toxic humility. This is often displayed in self-deprecating talk and a lack of self-confidence, belittling or undermining one’s own talents and abilities. The danger in this kind of behavior is twofold: it is too often accepted as true humility and like a virus, it spreads doubt and disbelief. To clarify, it is not that the bearer of this toxic humility isn’t honest about his view of himself. That is the very issue: he absolutely believes he has little value or utility. He thinks downplaying his own worth is humility but I disagree. CS Lewis said it best when he wrote, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking about yourself less.” His point being, true humility is not an ever-present raincloud of self-doubt that follows you around. It’s a focus on

Primed for Progress

Just as some pumps need to be primed to work effectively, our lives need to be “primed” to flow efficiently. Good mornings and productive days don’t happen by accident, and by “priming” your day, you can set yourself up for better results. Does it mean you won’t have bad days? Of course not, but it’s making your day happen instead of just waiting for what happens. Once again, it’s a choice of being proactive rather than reactive. You will still have challenges and difficulties, but how you face those hurdles and respond to the struggles will be different with a primed mindset. I am sure there are many ways to prime your day and set the tone for the hours ahead, and what works for one won’t necessarily work for all. However, the process of creating a plan or a model of how things should unfold is a great place for anyone to start. Also, as I have mentioned before, how you actually start the morning is critical - the battle with the alarm clock is your first chance at victory for

Flower Among Thorns

About six or seven years ago, my wife was around three months pregnant as we eagerly anticipated the birth of another child. One night, as I lay sleeping, I had a dream that our baby was born. It was a beautiful little girl with thin, wispy hair and large, bright eyes punctuating her beautiful face. I held her proudly in my arms and stared down at this precious little creation. I carefully handed her off to her older brother, who was just a toddler himself, as he sat on the coach, arms outstretched, anxiously awaiting the chance to hold his baby sister. I helped him prop up a pillow underneath his little arms to help support my daughter and then stepped back to take in the amazing sight as he gazed down at her with both pride and amazement in his eyes. As I stood there watching them, the dream quickly faded. When I woke up, my eyes met the tearful glance of my wife. “I’m bleeding,” she said as she fought back the emotions, “I think I am miscarrying.” Those words sunk deeply i

Mindset Matters

Search This Blog