Mindset Matters

Author Nick Murray notes the two essential attributes of a successful investor as patience and discipline. I think Nick would agree that these two traits would be found not just in effective investors, but also in those who have achieved success in any significant endeavor. Without a foundation of discipline and patience, talent, luck and timing simply don’t go very far. What I found of particular interest was Nick’s definition of these two attributes. He defined patience as the resistance to reacting and discipline as the persistence in proactively continuing to act in an appropriate and necessary manner. Although Nick was referring to investing, I think we can borrow those definitions for much broader use in many areas of our lives. Patience protects us from rash decisions. It prevents us from being pulled off course, from going down rabbit trails. It’s our inoculation against distraction and mistakes. Patience also sets the stage for discipline. While patience hel...

I heard once, “strive to be a thinker, but don’t let thinking be your goal.” That phrase sounds paradoxical, but as I have come to learn from my own trial and error as well as studying the experience of others, when thinking itself becomes the aim, not a whole lot gets accomplished. After all, greatest plans in the world are only as good as the extent to which they are followed. Early on in life, I learned critical thinking skills. In college, I had a wonderful professor who taught me how to reason more efficiently and to analyze more effectively. I began to understand how to ignore meaningless “noise” and focus on the variables of utmost importance. I would characterize myself as a good “thinker” and, as a self-proclaimed nerd, I have learned to be comfortable in that role. Heck, I’ve even come to enjoy learning and studying, something I’m sure my mother would have never guessed would happen. But what I have also learned is that a good doer beats a great thinker every ti...

A few weeks ago, I attended my niece’s baseball game. It was a cold, overcast evening with intermittent rain and wind leaving the ground messy and muddy, but don’t worry, the baseball was far worse than the weather conditions. Even calling this baseball was a bit of a stretch, as it was “coach pitch.” Well, it wasn’t even that, as the coaches had a mechanical pitching machine to assist them, but I digress. They weren’t keeping score, which I was prepared for, but it was still disappointing. Everyone got to bat every inning, which was annoying, but I guess that’s what they must do to keep everything “fair.” And if there’s one life lesson to learn in sports, it’s that life is fair and everyone gets an equal chance at everything (I can’t even write this with a straight face). Here’s what really got me though: there are no outs! A kid can swing and swing, missing pitch after pitch until the coach is worn out loading the little rubberized ball (they aren’t even real baseballs, we ...

According to the dictionary, a “glass ceiling” is defined as “an unofficially acknowledged barrier to advancement in a profession, especially affecting women and members of minorities.” I think we can extend this definition far beyond professions as many people are enclosed by artificial barriers affecting not just career, but personal development, social engagement and even family dynamics. And this expanded definition applies to far more than just women and minorities. We all come across unspoken boundaries in our lives and willingly let them hold us back, sometimes without even the consideration of breaching them, simply because we’ve allowed ourselves to succumb to their power in acknowledging their existence. Strikingly, many of these glass ceilings are self-imposed. We create a narrative in our minds that sets an arbitrary limit where no true bounds exist. Whether it’s resigning ourselves to a position or circumstance because of family history, perceived educational limit...

“The world will reward in public, the sacrifices you make in private.” – Tony Robbins While I don’t love the rah-rah cheerleader stage personality of Tony Robbins, I do appreciate the truth behind this statement. Unfortunately, human nature wants to skip the private sacrifices and go straight to the public praise. As a society, we are so enamored by the celebration of success that we often miss the foundation upon which those accomplishments are built. We watch Lebron and Curry perform in front of a sold-out crowd but miss the thousands of monotonous free throws practiced in a dark gym, the countless drills and the hours upon hours in the weight room executed in private. We see the success and impact of a Musk, Gates or Bezos but fail to consider the sleepless nights, the financial, emotional and relational costs on top of the grueling effort and determination spent behind closed doors. Achievement looks very glamorous in this social media age, but the path to getting t...

“I’m just not good enough to do …” “I don’t feel prepared for …” “I’m not ready to …” “I don’t have enough experience in …” I think we all have heard enough excuses to finish those sentences. Inherent in all those excuses is the perception of a talent deficiency. Fortunately, this world runs on skill, not talent. And skill can always be acquired. You may be born with talent in a certain area and a natural aptitude for a particular discipline. However, talent is no guarantee of skill. And the reverse is also true, as a lack of inherent gifting doesn’t prevent you from developing skill. Although developing aptitude is far easier with natural talent, the latter is not a prerequisite of the former. No one is born with skill. It is honed. It is developed. It is purchased with countless hours of dedicated and deliberate practice. It is built upon failure, not favor. You are endowed with talents by your Creator. Skill you must pay for. While it is great to have n...

How many people take the time to really consider what a win looks like? I mean intentionally questioning what is truly important and deciding what defines a victory for the day, the month and the season in which they find themselves. And yes, even what constitutes a successful life. We are constantly exposed to what others tell us winning should look like. It might be living in the biggest house on the block. Maybe it’s some new, foreign luxury car. It could be fame or a certain level of social status and notoriety. Perhaps it’s something more subtle, like having a certain net worth or being able to retire financially independent at an early age. While certainly there is nothing wrong with any of these things by themselves, they alone will hardly bring fulfillment and satisfaction. And yet, these are the icons of success we are told to chase. These are the criteria by which society has taught us to measure our progress. What about the coach who has the chance to impact th...

We love guarantees. Whether it be a warranty, an interest rate or a promise from the government, we are hard-wired to latch on to certainty and predictability. Unfortunately, guarantees are inversely correlated with freedom. As certainty and predictability in your life increase, freedom and flexibility naturally diminish. And that’s the problem with guarantees, people will still choose them even if something is guaranteed to suck! Just to have something they can count on, many will select a distasteful path or option, rather than take a chance at outstanding. Known suffering is often preferred over unknown outcomes. Never trade away your potential for a guarantee. No great achievement was ever accomplished under the banner of certainty. I guarantee it 😉

I’ve got a young son who has just started walking. It’s months after we expected him to walk, but I guess he wasn’t in much of a hurry since all he had to do was shout at one of his siblings and they’d pick him up. Then he would point, shout again, and said sibling would carry him anywhere he wanted to go. It’s fair to say he didn’t have a great incentive to walk on his own. I’m pretty sure if he had ready access to a rickshaw he would never be ambulatory. Just a few days into this new walking business – as my son wobbles around the house – he often has to stop, regain his balance and then continue. I thought about how different that is from learning how to ride a bike. The latter can be difficult for a young kid because as they start to lose their balance, the tendency is to slow down or stop to regain control. Unfortunately, it’s nearly impossible to balance on a stopped bicycle. To stay balanced, you must move forward. Isn’t this similar to everyday life? When things g...

On this date seventy-five years ago, over 150,000 Allied troops arrived along the coast of Normandy and stormed the beachheads of Utah, Sword, Gold, Juno and of course, Omaha. Thousands more invaded by air and were dropped behind enemy lines to support the beach landings. From every color and creed, soldiers from the United States, Canada and all across Europe – including escaped and exiled Germans – joined forces to face unknown but certain horrors to thwart the evils of the Nazi Regime. Battling harsh elements and the relentless onslaught of German artillery and tanks, the Allies advanced heroically to secure the blood-stained beaches. In doing so, they would ultimately signal the beginning of the end for Hitler’s reign of terror. The Normandy landings on D-Day initiated the greatest invasion in military history, unmatched before or since in magnitude or complexity, and set the stage for well over two million troops to begin advancing upon the German War Machine in the follow...

A couple of weeks ago, my wife and I learned we were pregnant again. My first reaction was excitement mixed with hesitation. Hesitation because it was still early in the pregnancy and we have struggled with miscarriages in the past. But I realized I really wanted another daughter and began imagining another baby girl in our home. There was also trepidation and a feeling of holding back as well. Something was hindering me from fully engaging the thought of another baby because I was afraid of the hurt and disappointment that would surely follow if we lost this child. My wife and I are all too familiar with that cycle of emotions. However, I also know that the only way to dull the potential pain of that loss would be to dull the anticipation of another child. It would require dulling the excitement. Dulling the joy. Dulling the hope. Dulling my spirit and ultimately, dulling who I am. I decided that is no way to live. I will experience plenty of heartache and loss in this life, b...

This morning I heard someone compare people to an orange, saying “you know what’s inside by what comes out when you are squeezed.” I guess with fruit it should be fairly predictable: squeeze an orange and orange juice comes out. Squeeze a lemon and you get lemon juice. With people it’s far more uncertain what you’ll get. Sometimes people surprise you with what comes out when they get squeezed by life. Then I got to thinking about myself. I don’t always like what comes out when I get squeezed. When the pressure is on, my patience can run thin, my temper can be short and grace/tenderness can all but evaporate. What comes out isn’t always all that sweet! These thoughts were quite convicting. If what comes out when I’m “squeezed” really is an indication of what’s inside (and I believe that’s pretty accurate, as I would expect it to be for most people), I’ve still got a lot of work to do!