Rediscovering Recitals

One of my sisters is a piano teacher and hosted a recital for her students this past weekend. She invited my seven-year-old daughter, Brooklynn, to observe the performances in hopes Brook would start up lessons again. Although Brooklynn very much enjoyed the recital, she still has reservations about performing in one herself. The idea of getting up in front of a crowd of strangers to play is quite frightening to her.

For a young child, even performing in front of a small crowd must feel like playing for the whole world. The “whole world” would be listening and watching, observing every mistake and missed note. She would be completely exposed. Who wouldn’t be terrified of that?!? As adults, we rarely put ourselves in a position where our mistakes and failures are in full view of the world around us. We make our kids do recitals, spelling bees and plays – where they must practice and perform a new skill or face an unknown challenge with the world watching – yet rarely are we in such a vulnerable place. Why are we asking our kids to do something we aren’t willing to do ourselves?

When was the last time you had a “recital”? When was the last time you put something out there for the world to judge? When was the last time you were so exposed that you allowed a crowd of strangers, or even friends, to watch you attempt something new, something at which you might fail or screw up?

I think it would be healthy for all of us to schedule a “recital” every now and then, if for nothing else, to remind ourselves that failure and mistakes – even something as humiliating as messing up with the “world” watching – won’t kill us. Failure and mistakes will always be painful, but inoculating one’s self with a “recital” every now and then might take a lot of the sting away.

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