Mindset Matters

  We often use learning and education as synonymous, interchangeable terms. They are nothing of the sort. We all know plenty of people who are well-educated yet could really use some learning! Education happens when you increase your knowledge. Learning happens when you understand how to use that knowledge to its full and intended potential, when you can wield that knowledge effectively. Education is about information. It is more passive. It is something that happens to you. Learning is about discernment, not just knowing the right things but also doing them. It is active and requires engagement. While we may not learn without also being educated, we can be educated without actually learning. Think of knowledge as a tool. A tool provides leverage and, when applied properly, can add effectiveness and efficiency to the task at hand. But if misused, even a wonderful tool is worthless at best and likely even harmful. A chainsaw might be an effective tool, but in the hands of an e...

William James, the famous philosopher and psychologist, once said, “Our life experience will equal what we pay attention to, whether by choice or by default.” Even though that quote is roughly a century-and-a-half-old, do you think those words could have ever been more pertinent than they are today? Between social media, 24/7 “news” channels, live streaming anything and everything, never ending emails and constant bombardment by beeps, dings and alerts from our smartphones, our attention is in a constant state of being hi-jacked. We must constantly fight to keep our focus from being diverted by trivial, meaningless and even destructive interruptions. What is more, in the hyper-sensitive and sensationalized world we live in, when our attention is kidnapped by the latest headline, health mandate, political scandal, it can be difficult to disengage without losing precious time and peace of mind. If our life experience truly does equal what we pay attention to, that is a terrifying t...

  I met a lot of kids in college who excused their poor grades by saying, “I am just not a good test taker.” These were largely the same students who had poor study habits, partied too much and did not spend a lot of time in class. Funny how not studying, not sleeping, skipping class, and being drunk all weekend makes taking a test on Monday a bit difficult. But many of us live our lives that way even as adults. We fail to prepare for important life events and then come up with excuses when the failure catches up with us. Exam day is too late to prepare for the test. When divorce papers are filed, it is probably too late to learn how to love your spouse. Having a heart attack is not the time to start eating healthy and exercising. Waiting until you are on the brink of bankruptcy is not when you should be getting on a budget. We all too often wait until disaster is knocking on the doorstep before we prepare for its inevitable arrival. This year has been a very poignant example...

  A joyful, fulfilling life seems to come from balance. A balance between being engaged in the moment yet still planning for the future and learning from the past. A balance between working hard, but still having fun. A balance between being cautious but still taking measured risks. A balance between taking care of ourselves, but still being generous to others. I struggle with balance. I struggle … To be ambitious but not obsessed. To be productive but find time to be calm and quiet. To be firm but tender. To be driven but gracious. To be disciplined but flexible. To be consistent but open-minded. To be passionate but not overbearing. To be determined but not stubborn. To be committed to excellence but not consumed by it. Sometimes our greatest strengths can become weaknesses if not kept in check. Without balance an asset can be a liability. Balance is not static; it is fluid. It is not something we achieve, but rather a pursuit. It is something that we...

  Over the last few days, we have been going through the exciting process of potty training my two-year-old son. I wanted to leave him a little encouragement this morning, but he was still asleep when I left the house. I was hastily trying to get out the door but decided to pause and write him a short note. The note was simple and concise, essentially saying “You are doing a great job potty training. Keep peeing and pooping in the toilet. I love you!” Nothing particularly articulate. Maybe even a little crude. But ever since my wife read him the note, he has been proudly carrying it around with him, showing it to his brothers and sisters and reminding them of his potty-training prowess. A few simple sentences made his day. If we are really honest with ourselves, each one of us still has that child inside of us. It is the part of us that desperately longs to hear the phrases, “You did a good job,” “Nice work,” “I appreciate you,” and “You are enough.” No matter what we accomplis...

Drew Dernavich is a well-known and well-respected cartoonist for the New Yorker. His creativity in humor is legendary and he has been the recipient of numerous awards. It’s been suggested he has never created a cartoon that wasn’t funny. Drew knows better. He knows that for every cartoon that is submitted to the New Yorker, Google, TIME, The Wall Street Journal, or other various publications, there is a large stack of creations that never make it off his desk. Although Drew is famous for his hundreds of published cartoons, behind those hits are thousands of duds. Drew has suggested that one of the reasons he has so many published works is that he also probably has one of the largest “reject” piles. Drew understands that every idea is not going to be successful, but every failure brings him one step closer to his next success. Like Edison, to find what works, Drew must come up with countless ideas that do not work. While Drew Dernvich is undoubtedly a creative genius, it is his pe...

  Have you ever noticed how vague we are about our goals and long-term plans? We hear a lot of “someday” or “one day I’d like to …” And not only are we vague about timelines, we are also pretty fuzzy about a desired outcome as well, “I’d like to read more” or “I will lose some weight.” Read more than what? Lose how much weight, six ounces or 20 pounds? Whether it is intentional or not, being vague keeps us from being accountable. Others cannot call us on what we said we are going to do because “someday” has not yet arrived. More than that, we give ourselves too much leash by not making a clear commitment in our own minds. By not defining the “win” we feel like we can avoid the sting of failure. But the opposite is also true, without risking failure, we cannot ever experience true victory. If you set deadlines and specific targets, yes, you risk missing the mark and experiencing the pain of temporary failure. Telling yourself or others “I plan to be the VP of our marketing dep...

  I left my house early yesterday morning before anyone else was awake. A couple miles down the road I realized I had forgotten something on the kitchen counter and turned around to go back for it. I pulled up to the front of the house, punched in the key code and entered through the front door rather than opening up the garage. As I walked into the living room towards the kitchen, I heard my son sprint down the hallway and run down the stairs. It warmed my heart that he would be so enthusiastic about greeting me that morning. I gave him a big hug, told him I loved him and headed back out to the car (after grabbing my water bottle off the counter, of course). It wasn’t until I got home later that night that I learned why he had come downstairs in such a hurry. My son had not rushed out of his room and down the stairs to give me a hug before I left. He had been asleep and was awakened by our security system alert, “front door open,” and in his sleepy daze, assumed an intruder ha...