Mindset Matters

When you first mix and pour cement, it is thick and viscous but still pliable. You can still mold and shape it with effort. You can remove objects from it or firmly plant something in it. However, as time goes on, the cement hardens and becomes less malleable. More effort and energy is required to manipulate it. Eventually, it solidifies and what was once flexible and temporary is now rigid and permanent. Our habits are much the same way. While it is never easy to change our habits and routines, they are more pliable early on. Though they still require exertion and determination to alter, their shape isn’t solidified yet. As time passes, however, they become more fixed and rigid, increasingly resistant to change. If those habits remain in place long enough, they become almost impossible to modify, requiring a shattering event to break the mold, often accompanied by pain and collateral damage. Breaking a bad habit or optimizing a sub-par routine is never easy. But it only...

Human nature is very selfish and outcome-oriented. We want results that benefit us, and we want them now. Because of this, we often measure success by what we have gained and how it profits us. What would it look like if we measured success, not by what we harvest, but by the number of seeds we planted, regardless of who reaps the reward? For one, it’s input and action-oriented, rather than outcome-based. I don’t have complete control over the harvest, but I can control the number of seeds I plant and where I plant them. And for two, I enjoy the fruits of seeds planted by many others, so shouldn’t I be planting seeds from which others reap? And lastly, it gets us thinking beyond immediate results and looking at the enduring consequences of our actions, whether positive or negative. By focusing on the seeds you plant rather than the crop you harvest, you shift your perspective out of the moment of off yourself. That seems like a more enjoyable way to live.

We take many precautions in life to protect our valuables. We insure our cars and our homes. We buy security systems and alarms. We store guns and jewelry in safes. We make sure our checking accounts are FDIC insured. We have long lists of cryptic passwords and usernames (and not so cryptic, for those of you still using your name or email address as a password) to protect online accounts. Yet, we are so flippant and reckless with one of our most priceless assets: time. We leave our time vulnerable and unprotected. And it’s not just that we aren’t careful to keep others from stealing it, we haphazardly squander it. We freely flitter it away. Cars and even homes can be replaced. We can blow money today but work hard and invest to make up for that in the future. But time we never get back. I wonder how different our choices would look if we treasured our time like the other precious assets in our life? “So it is: we are not given a short life but we make it short, and we a...

I am gassing up my car on the way home from work yesterday when I notice a young boy on the other side of the pump staring at my car. I know he’s intrigued so I break the ice and say hi. “Is that a Lamborghini?” he asks, ignoring my greeting. I laugh and explain it isn’t, it is a Corvette. I tell him I have wanted one since I was five years old, but just in the last few months I finally got one. He’s standing in the shadow of the pump, but his eyes are so wide and bright, I can see them dancing with excitement and wonder. I remember back to being a young boy myself and staring at a Corvette in the very same way, dreaming about owning one someday. I invite him to take a closer look, and as he steps out from behind the pump, I can see he has no eyebrows and the only hair on his head is in sparse whisps. Clearly this little boy is battling cancer. I think of myself as that young boy wishing for a Corvette, having my whole life in front of me: all the dreams, expectations, and auda...

We are all well aware of the disappointment that comes from failing something important. A botched interview for a tremendous job, a rejection on a college application, a proposal that gets denied (marriage or at work), a promotion that goes to your arch rival (my wife has clarified those aren’t just for superheroes), a sales call that goes south, etc. The pain from those types of failure is very salient and raw. Despite the sting that comes from failing at something that significant, there may be even greater danger in succeeding at something that isn’t. When we succeed in areas that are trivial, there is tremendous pressure to stay on that course, even if it isn’t the path we supposed to be traveling. Quick, easy wins in a game we aren’t meant to play tempt us to keep playing and keeps us from weightier matters. After all, we tell ourselves, why risk failing at something big when we can notch victories on Easy Street? Leaning too heavily on success in unimportant areas of...

As local governments gradually move through recovery phases, and life in America slowly creeps backs towards “normal,” there is a risk that we rush back to our previous lives too quickly. Please understand, I am not referring to the potentially heightened risk of infection from Covid (or any other sickness) as we increase human contact or a “second wave” of cases we keep hearing about. While those may be risks, there’s another risk many seem to be ignoring. As businesses shut down and both social and work-related gatherings were eliminated, many busy Americans found unfamiliar margin in their schedules. For the first time in possibly years, whether by design or default, people actually had free time again. And while we all probably spent at least some of that precious windfall on Netflix marathons, highly speculative ‘round-the-clock “breaking news and other less-than-beneficial activities, we still have the opportunity to create new and better habits with our time.   A...

We hear a lot about time management but much less about energy management. Time is fixed. We all have 24 hours in the day. But energy is fluid. Our effectiveness in that 24 hours is very dependent on the intensity and intentionality of our energy. I can go for a walk, and after an hour, I may have gone three miles or so. I’ve been working and exercising that entire time. But if I jog that same three miles, I’ll have knocked out the three miles in half the time. By managing my energy and increasing the intensity of my output, I now have more time but still accomplished the same amount of work. Many areas of our lives work in much the same way. We all know people who are always seem busy, but get very little done because their energy isn’t focused. They hop from task to task, never fully engaging long enough in one thing to be effective. They operate with little intensity or intentionality and thus manage to cram 180 minutes of real work into a ten-hour day. However, b...

It’s very easy to say we want something, but it’s far more difficult to get our actions to align with that desire. How often is “I want to earn more money” backed up by the sacrifices necessary to command a greater salary in the marketplace? We hear, “I want a better body,” yet the drive through at McDonald’s is always full and gyms are often empty (even before ‘Rona made that especially true!). We complain about our relationships and express a longing for better friends yet neglect to become more caring and compassionate or develop the listening skills that a great friend desires. We do a lot of wishing and wanting when we should be working. You are likely surrounded by people who complain about their circumstances but do nothing to change them. People who are sitting around, waiting for their desires to be fulfilled while they remain idle. Ambitions are like water; they can be refreshing and revitalizing, but once they become stagnant, they start to stink. You aren’t Alad...

Optimists sometimes get a bad rap because they are viewed as being blindly positive, like Pollyanna on Prozac. We call them dreamers, condemning them for having their heads in the clouds and being out of touch with reality around them. But having a positive outlook is essential for having a positive impact. And it’s not just seeing the glass as half full, it’s imagining the possibilities for the other half. It’s seeing what could be but isn’t yet. And this is where dreamers and optimists share some similarities: they both look into the future and view it as better than the past. However, dreamers see that better future and wish for it to happen. A true optimist works to make it happen. And therein lies all the difference.

We hear a lot about efficiency these days. Self-help books, technology, life hacks and motivational speakers all provide us tools for becoming more efficient, allowing us to do more things in less time. But is that really a good goal, just to cram more into our already busy lives? Instead of simply seeking ways to do things right, we should be striving to do the right things. If efficiency is an end goal in and of itself, we may learn to be very productive in the wrong activities, efficiently doing what need not be done at all. Efficiency may be doing more with less, but to be effective, we cannot simply do more of the same. We must prudently discern what most needs to be done and execute those tasks above all others. We must evaluate and prioritize first, and then worry about efficiency. A Toyota Prius may move you down the highway getting 58 miles to the gallon, a highly efficient vehicle indeed. But how effective is it if it is taking you in the opposite direction of whe...

Herbert Simon, a Carnegie Mellon professor, has an insightful observation regarding the myriad information at our fingertips. He said, “Information consumes the attention of its recipients. A wealth of information creates a poverty of attention.” The concern Simon has is that we neglect to manage the information and knowledge to which we have unprecedented access. Our attention is spread so thin that we are not effective with any of it. Add to that the misinformation that also inundates us, and our attention is soon impoverished indeed.   In short, we are plagued by a lack of focus. As our attention becomes scattered, the information we possess becomes impotent without the proper energy and intensity behind it. Just like the nail-file/flashlight/toothbrush/can opener/shoehorn combo tool you can only buy in a Skymall catalog, by engaging too many tasks, we are effective in none of them.